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Today 10:29 AM

Hi, I'm Unna. What's on your mind? Ask me anything about sex, love, or relationships.

The sex with my partner has gone stale. Help?

Stale is just coasting — easy to fix. Change one thing: where, when, or who's in charge. What's the fantasy you haven't said out loud?

I want to bring toys in, but I'm scared they'll feel replaced.

A toy's a tool, not a rival — it takes the pressure off, it doesn't take your place. Frame it as "us," not "instead of you."

How do I even bring it up without it getting awkward?

Pick a calm moment, not the bedroom. Try: "I've been wanting us to try something new together — are you open to it?"

Okay. What if they say they're not into toys?

Then you get curious, not crushed. Ask what does feel exciting to them. Desire is a map you draw together.

We used to be spontaneous. Now it's the same routine every time.

Routine dulls novelty — and novelty is what your brain reads as "wanting." Change the script: new time of day, new room, clothes on.

Clothes on? How does that help?

Anticipation. Slowing down and teasing builds arousal far more than rushing to the main event. Make each other wait for it.

I feel weird admitting I want more. Like I'm being demanding.

Wanting more isn't demanding — it's honest. Your pleasure isn't a bonus, it's half the point. Say what you like out loud.

I don't always know what I like, though.

That's normal — and worth exploring on your own first. You can't ask for a destination you haven't visited yourself.

Is it bad that I picture other scenarios during sex?

Not at all. Fantasy is rehearsal, not betrayal — it's one of the most common and healthiest parts of desire.

My partner has a fantasy that intimidates me a little.

Intimidating usually means "new," not "wrong." Ask questions before you decide. Curiosity lowers the stakes.

What if we try something and I don't like it?

Then you have a safe word and you stop — no penalty. Trying isn't a contract. "Let's pause" is always allowed.

How do we keep talking about this without it getting tense?

Check in outside the bedroom, keep it light, and lead with what worked. "More of that" lands better than "less of this."

Honestly, this is the first time I've said any of it out loud.

Then you've already done the hardest part. Naming it is where intimacy starts.

Thank you. Can you give us something to try tonight?

Yes — a 10-minute "senses" swap: take turns, one touch at a time, no goal. Want me to walk you both through it?

Yes please.

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For too long, people have been told to stay quiet about their questions, hide their struggles, or settle for misinformation.

We believe sexual wellness is healthcare.
We believe asking for help should never feel embarrassing.
We believe everyone deserves access to qualified professionals who understand both the science of sexuality and the culture we live in.

That's why we built Unprude.